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Shelton Mason County Journal
Shelton, Washington
March 12, 2020     Shelton Mason County Journal
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March 12, 2020

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Page A-4 Shelton-Mason County Journal Thursday, March 12, 2020 t ) THESE TIMES Some dreams, these dreams many of which are short scenes filled with gruesome, funny and bizarre bits, like a Coen brothers movie. I haven’t given much thought to what the following dreams might mean, also like a Coen brothers movie. Here are some favorites: Enjoy! I was in bed with Mrs. Ericson and she was preg- nant. I put my ear to her bel- ly and heard the sound that sonar makes when it picks up a submarine: “Ping ping ping.” She awoke, startled, and I told her nothing was wrong, but I knew we weren’t having a baby. We were hav— B ing a U-boat. And I knew it was my fault because males supply the U chromosome. A friend and I were standing next to a bonfire near my childhood home in Spokane and an elephant was in the fire — it apparently was our job to burn elephants. The next moment, the elephant began an an- guished trumpet and raised its paw to its heart as it fell into the core of the fire. It was a horrible sight. I looked at my friend and said, “Next time, let’s shoot them first.” It was Ireland, circa the 1800s, and the Irish were rebelling. An Irish paramilitary commander was inter- viewing potential recruits. My view was from behind the commander, who looked into the face of each re- cruit-as he stood in front of him. The cemmander asked each recruit, “Are you crazy enough to fight the Brit- ish? Are you brave enough to fight the British?” To prove his bravery and craziness, each recruit took out a handgun, put the barrel to his neck and pulled the trigger. At the instant of each gunshot, the scene switched to a view immediately behind the recruit, which was a field of emerald green clover. A splash of blood splat- tered on the clover after every gun; shot. Then another. And another. I was leafing through a maga- zine when I came across a series of pictures laid out over two facing pag~ es. The first image was of an Inuit boy, around 5 years old, pointing a rifle at a charging caribou. The series of pictures were shown in infrared, so I saw the heat register of the caribou, the register of the boy and a small glow of onlookers who were far away. In a progression of pictures, the charging caribou drew closer and ' closer to the little boy until an explo- l SHELTON-MASON COUNTY USPS 492-800 Ioften remember my dreams, POSTMASTER: Send address changes to Shelton—Mason County Journal: PO. Box 430, Shelton. WA 98584. Published weekly by the Shelton-Mason County Journal at 227 W. Cota St., Shelton, Washington. Mailing address: PO. Box 430, Shelton, WA 98584 Telephone: 360-426—441 2 Website: www.masoncounty.com Periodicals postage paid in Shelton, Washington. yKIRK ’ ERICSON ‘ sion of infrared came when the boy fired his rifle. The next-to-last picture showed the boy falling backward and the caribou collapsing. The last picture was of the crowd celebrating, bearing the boy away on their shoul- ders. I was riding a city bus. I didn’t have a job, nor didl have any family or friends, when Michael McKean, one of the actors in the movie “This Is Spinal Tap,” walked onto the bus. He looked around, spotted me at the back of the bus and imme- . diater hurried toward me. I figured he wanted to work with me on a film, which made me happy. He stood ‘in front of me and said, “I need to talk to you, but let’s wait until we get to Barnes & Noble.” We arrived at the bookstore, entered, and he turned and said, “I understand you know the best way to get roofing tar out of clothes. What’s your secret?” I was crushed, but I told him, “Some tur- pentine and a stiff brush. And scrub hard.” McKean said “thanks” and walked away. I wandered to the end of the store, lonelier than ever. I sat at a table, which was in front of a stage where five or six women were V doing the cancan dance. I looked at the dancers and thought, “I don’t enjoy this. I’m incapable of enjoying this. I must have ...” And I couldn’t remember the word that describes the inability to feel pleasure, which woke me up. I was walking along a hospi- tal corridor when I passed a semi- open door. Inside the room sat an old man perched on a bed pan, his pants around his ankles. Disgusted, I turned away, but not before I noticed a tattoo on the outside of his left thigh. The tattoo showed him sitting in precisely the same position, with precisely the same look on his face as i the image he was presenting to me at that moment. I was working in military ac- quisitions, the helmet division. I was angling for a promotion, so I made a suggestion: We should replace hel- mets with cubes of butter because not only would a cube of butter fit on a head, people could butter toast with it, too. Or fry eggs in it. A helmet’s just a helmet, I pointed out, but a cube of butter is so much more. I didn’t get the promotion. I awoke. I Contact Kirk Ericson at kirk@ masoncounty.com. The Shelton-Mason County Jour- nal is a member of the Wash— ington Newspaper Publishers Association. SUBSCRIPTION RATES: $52 per year ($43 for six months) for Mason County addresses and $75 per year ($55 for six months) outside of Mason County. Owned and published by Publisher: Tom Mullen Advertising: ' John Lester, general manager Theresa Murray, ad representative Front office: Donna Kinnaird, bookkeeper Dave Pierik, circulation and classifieds manager JOURNAL EDITORIAL , Idea to alter county form of government intriguing oters decided that Shelton s should have a seven-member council instead of a three- member commission could the county’s elected board be next? Members of the League of Women Voters will learn about Home Rule Charters — or ways that counties can implement their own forms of government that are different from the state’s standard three-member commission form of government — during Tuesday’s meeting at the Johnson Library at Olympic College Shelton. The meeting comes after a local group of residents announced to the Board of Mason County Commission- ers on Monday that it was meeting regularly to discuss the idea. For a full story, see page A—2. The main reasdn to adopt a Home Rule Charter would be to expand the number of members who serve on the Board of County Commissioners. According to the Municipal Re- search and Services Center, a non- profit that provides legal and policy guidance to Washington government agencies, seven counties in Washing- ton have adopted home rule charters —— King County in 1969, Clallam County in 1977, Whatcom County in 1979, Snohomish County in 1980, Pierce County in 1981, San Juan , YIKESI SOAP AND WATERl Newsroom: Delivery: Karen Hranac, customer service representative Jon Garza David Olson ' Shelton-Mason County Journal, Inc. Adam Rudnick, editor in chief Gordon Weeks, reporter Michael Heinbach, reporter Justin Johnson, sports/outdoors editor Molly Walsh, reporter Kirk Ericson, columnist/ proofreader Shawna-Whelan, photographer Lloyd Mullen, photo editor County in 2006 and Clark County in 2015. Twelve other counties —Kitsap, Island, Thurston, Cowlitz, Ferry, Skamania, Spokane, Yakima, Asotin, Jefferson, Lewis and Skagit — have attempted and failed to adopt home rule charters. - ' The decision to look at th county’s form of government comes less than two years after Shelton voters approved a ballot measure that changed the city’s form of gov— ernment. A ground-swell of voters pushed the measure through after public records requests showed communication among members of the Shelton City Commission outside of public meetings, which violated the state’s Open Public Meetings Act. We haven’t had a similar seminal moment at the county level, but we’d like to see where this citizen group goes with the idea. We know it’s early in the process, but in theory, we support a form of government that wOuld get more voices — and viewpoints on the county’s most powerful elected board. If you’re curious about Home Rule Charter, plan on being at the meet- ing from noon to 1:30 p.m. Tuesday at Olympic College Shelton, 937 W. Alpine Way. Composing room: William Adams, technology and design manager Linda Frizzell, graphics All regular editorial, advertising and legal deadlines are 5 p.m. the Monday prior to publication. To submit a letter to the editor, email adam@masoncounty.com.