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00ournal of Opinion:
Grad oration
Fellow graduates, parents, families, faculty, dudes watching
the streaming video on their computers and friends I'm, like,
simultaneously text-messaging as I give this speech:
Well, these last 13 years have been a long haul, especially
the first seven when we were being left behind, but now
we're ready for the next stage of our lives: changing the
world for the better.
The message I want to leave with you tonight before you start
shooting the Silly String is that even though our parents did an
incredible job of improving things, such as enlarging our carbon
footprint, cultivating our status in the Muslim world and providing
us with a tip-top popular culture, we can do even better. We can
take the American dream to new heights.
So while my mom drives a little Blazer I won't settle
for anything less than an Escalade for my wife, and my
promise to my daughter will be a brand-new 2024 Hummer
when she turns 16. My parents, bless them, built a little
3,200-square-foot crackerbox of a house, but I want at least
4,200. And I plan to live at least 40 miles from work so I can
spend quality time in my car talking on my cell phone and
listening to my favorite rap and bass beat at 320 decibels.
Our generation will build more highways, third and fourth
Narrows bridges and affordable housing for 10 million
Washingtonians. Yes, we'll grow, and we'll do it by finally
making people as important as fish, paving wetlands and
farms and claiming the woods from the cougar and bear
and stupid owl.
I don't know about you, but my education didn't end when I
walked out of my last final in woodshop this week. I'll listen to
shock jocks and TV to get a feel for the world around me. I'll buy
an Enquirer or Star every once in a while to stay informed but
not one of those boring newspapers. I'll vote if Tim Eyman has
something on the ballot, but who's got time otherwise?
The girls of our generation had outstanding role models
in Madonna, Courtney Love and Anna Nicole Smith, smart
businesswomen who used their brains to advance, but
there is so much more potential for our daughters. They
will be able to idolize Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan and
Paris Hilton, which will make it nice for our red-blooded
sons. TV and movies are entering their Golden Era just
in time for us to raise our kids on them and the Internet.
MySpace hasn't seen anything until the pictures of my
gorgeous 14-year-old daughter hit.
Interpersonal communication has been improving since
the Tech Revolution started, but we can take it to the zenith,
spending hours on the Web, dog-piling on someone in a chat room,
e-mailing the person in the next cubicle at work, checking our
BlackBerrys and cell phones for 20 minutes at parties, signing
on-line guest books instead of going to funerals and building more
drive-throughs.
Our parents had something called civil liberties, which
sounds pretty suspicious to me. We can have a better
world, one with warrantless searches, wiretapped phones,
FBI and Hbmeland Security collection of data on citizens,
detention without charges, government regulation of the
press, roadblocks for drunk-driving checks, weekly drug
tests for schoolchildren and undercover officers working
in the schools. Then we'll be safe.
Our parents and older brothers and sisters brought regime
change and peace to Iraq, but we can bring Pax Halliburtona to
so many more - in Iran, North Korea, Venezuela and France.
Then, after we bring new leadership to one of our worst enemies,
we'll stand down when the French stand up.
We won't stop until we have completed our parents'
mission to outsource every manufacturing and support
job in the United States, leaving us all with mice in our
hands at work in the Information Age. Americans don't
need strong backs; all they need are strong index fingers
to double-click. Anything menial that needs to be done
here we can have Hispanics do before we arrest them.
We won't even need farms. The Chinese will provide all we
need to eat, and we'll be able to depend on their spotless food-
safety record and our good credit.
The Class of 2007 will be the doers. We'll build the Sonics
a $500-million arena as a top priority and bring more
cage-fighting events to the Tacoma Dome. We'll solve the
obesity epidemic with new drugs for diabetes, cholesterol
and hypertension. We'll fix our educational system with
more tests. We'll build vast new prisons to resolve the
crime problem. Weql expand gambling to provide more
revenue for the government. We'll develop a better
hydrogen bomb to defend ourselves. We'll bring Starbucks
to the Third World. We'll restore the right kind of prayer
in our schools. We'll pass a constitutional amendment to
stop flag-burning, one of the most serious problens this
country faces.
By the time we finish improving the world, our kids will thank
us at their own high-school graduation. In fact, there probably
won't be anything left that they can improve.
-CG
u
Shelton-00 at
00lason ourn
county usPs 492-800
POSTMASTER: Send address changes to Shelton-Mason
County Journal, P.O. Box 430, Shelton, WA 98584•
Published weekly by Shelton Publishing Inc. at 227 West Cota Street, Shelton, Washington
Mailing address: p.o. Box 430, Shelton, WA 98584
Telephone (360) 426-4412 * www.masoncounty.com
Periodicals postage paid at Shelton. Washington
Member of Washington Newspaper Publishers' Association
SUBSCRIPTION RATES: $31.00 per year in-county address,
$45.00 per year in state of Washington $55.00 per year out of state
Charles Gay, editor and publisher. Newsroom: Sean Hanlon, managing editor, Port of Shelton;
Steve Patch, sports editor; Jeff Green, general assignment, city government, schools; Rebecca
Wells, society editor, county government; Mary Duncan, police, courts. Advertising: Stephen
Gay, advertising manager; Dave Pierik and Harvey Morris, ad sales. Front office: Julie Orme,
business manager; Kathy Lester, circulation; Donna Kinnaird, bookkeeper; Cricket Carter, mailroom
supervisor. Composing room: Diane Riordan, supervisor; Margot Brand, Jan Kaltinen, pagination;
Frank Isaac, pagination, photo technician; Koleen Wood, typesetter, computer system manager; Wil-
liam Adams, ad builder, computer system manager; Clinton Kendall, proofreader. Pressroom: Kelly
Riordan, pressman; Nick Carr, pressman's assistant.
Page 4 - Shelton-Mason County Journal - Thursday, June 14, 2007
II
i00eadeJ's;" 00ournal:
School action not disturbing
Editor, The Journal."
In rebuke of the Hood Canal
School Board's recent decision
to make administrative changes
(June 7 letter, "Hood Canal move
disturbing"), Merlyn Flakus al-
ludes in spirit to the old bumpkin
aphorism, "If it ain't broke don't
fix it." Such thinking cautions us
to uphold status quo and tempts
us to accept things as they are cur-
rently operating when they could
be made to operate better.
In defense of status quo, Flakus
discounts the competence of the
school board by making puerile
jabs at motives, character and in-
tentions, which he had to invent
on his own since he doesn't know
what the real ones are. To the con-
trary, I think that the board has
made administrative.changes in
good faith and with courage and
has defended a difficult decision
that is in the best interest of the
children in our community.
Hood Canal, in my view as a
parent of two attending students,
is not a progressive model of a
school. It lacks any sort of arts,
music or language programs. It
lacks a technology program. Its
classroom office equipment is usu-
ally outdated. Its sports facilities
and" equipment are often inade-
quate. The school basically has the
look and feel of being underfund-
ed. Many residents go out of their
way to send their children to grade
school or junior high in Shelton in-
stead of Hood Canal due to some
perceived inadequacy or another.
While Hood Canal might be
"working" in whatever way Flakus
means to suggest, it certainly could
work much better. It is the prima-
ry job of school boards to hold ad-
ministrators to the standards and
expectations of the constituency
that keeps them at their post, and
I believe the Hood Canal School
Board or, at least three-fifths of it,
is doing just that.
Flakus issues a "call to arms"
for new board members who I sup-
pose, like him, think that chang-
ing the status quo is typically bad.
Hood Canal needs committed ad-
ministrators and board membe
• '11
who are continuously seeki g
make :hanges and address di"
cul sues within the fram ew¢
of enhancing the education
character of our children.
Perceived crises in
always bring opinion.
fusspots like Merlyn FlakuS
others who really are not
in the education of our
flock to board meetings
and prattling and conjuring
lems in order to have so
to criticize. As soon as eve
calms down, away they go
their bags full of wisdon i
of some new controversy,
set foot in the school board
again.
I urge voters who are
in this matter to seek the
opinions of the parents and
ers of the Hood Canal School
trict and to take with a gri.
salt the rhetoric of our,
ubiquitous rabble-rousers. .
Rob Endi
H odW
The Journal is anti-veteran
Editor, The Journal:
Kudos to the Forest Festival
Committee for its untiring efforts
year after year to ensure the citi-
zens of Shelton an outstanding
parade as well as other extra ac-
tivities,
It was extra gratifying to see
the picture of tii Boy Scout Troop
110. As the adjutant of the Sons
of the American Legion Squadron
No. 31, we are honored and proud
to be their sponsors. Squadron
commander Mav Rowley is our
representative to the troop.
There is a very important is-
sue that needs to be addressed, to
wit, the absence of any pictures of
the American Legion, Veterans of
Foreign Wars and members of the
40 et 8 and the LaFemmes. These
four units are very much civic-ori-
ented.
I have heard many comlnents
about this situation. It is very ap-
parent to a majority of us that The
Journal is anti-veteran.
These veterans' organizations
donate many hours and funds
support of the youth of our c0'
munity.
We sincerely hope this overs t:h
will be corrected in the future.
Gordie Rich.°-
Life member American Le
Veterans of Foreign "%
Disabled American VeteW,'
Sons of The American be
Mr. Bush, tear down that w$00l
Montana may revolt" some st
may wish to secede.' The prOfi;
may take decades to reach eqt it
rium, but with reasonabl s
Editor, The Journal:
Even the casual reader of the
daily news can't help but conclude
that our Congress is in a hopeless
state of confusion. The immigra-
tion issue is a perfect example: One
hundred senators have so far man-
aged to turn the problem into 350
pages of what they probably con-
sider "tightly reasoned" rules and
regulations to solve the problem
but which can only be understood
by a bunch of high-priced lawyers
who would tell you (if quizzed off
the record) that the whole thing is
unworkable anyway.
We all know what the problem
is: Mexicans want to come to the
U.S. for a variety of reasons but
are denied legal entry by burden-
some and lengthy legalities which
once were considered reasonable
but are no longer adequate for
today's problems. So many Mexi-
cans now sneak across the border
illegally that "experts" estimate
their number to be upwards of 12
million. Walking down a street in
any Southern California town you
would be hard-pressed to know
whether you are in the United
States or Mexico. Trying to stem
the tide of "illegals" is like shovel-
ing sand into the wind, which is
exactly what Congress is doing.
Let us face reality and accept
an unpopular solution. It will be
called dual citizenship, an open
border, free movement of citizens
of both countries to pass freely
back and forth. We might as well
coniler including all the coun-
tries of Central America in this
plan. Tear down the fence that is
now building but save the parts
because we will need to erect it
again perhaps down near Panama
where it can be much shorter and
more easily patrolled.
The United States of North
America! Think of the opportuni-
ties for Anglo entrepreneurs! So
much development will take place
in the Mexican states that their
unemployed workers will stay
home. Millions of U.S. citizens will
move south to live in the sun; ho-
tels and casinos will line the Mexi-
can coast; inland, manufacturing
plants will have jobs that attract
workers from north and south. Ah,
the possibilities!
Concessions will be required on
both sides, of course. Bilingualism
will be necessary; the respective
governments will be adjusted in
ways yet to be determined. The
Anglo population must insist that
Mexico clean up its bad habits
concerning public corruption, ex-
tortion, bribery, cumshaw, palm
greasing, etc., until the practice is,
at least, brought up to levels pre-
vailing in our country.
There are endless problems of
course, and monumental details
to be worked out, but they can be
done. Tranquility will not come
at once; great patience will be re-
quired. The citizens of Idaho and
can be accomplished, ve
Congress will be in hog henri
working out the details. We€
be so busy here at home there
be no need to go off and make
chief in other parts of the wor
Look at it this way" If Hera ":
Cortez and his fellows had..
Englishmen instead of Spar
the whole thing would have ri
an accomplished fact o
ago. Pete :1
What was that soOg
.... o the
t'aul simon sang - .,,e
Parisians about s LI *'.,
exits at their most fa Sa°
museum?
"Fifty Ways to LeaVe Y°ar
Louvre."
me
--mmi
00ournal of Opinion:
Grad oration
Fellow graduates, parents, families, faculty, dudes watching
the streaming video on their computers and friends I'm, like,
simultaneously text-messaging as I give this speech:
Well, these last 13 years have been a long haul, especially
the first seven when we were being left behind, but now
we're ready for the next stage of our lives: changing the
world for the better.
The message I want to leave with you tonight before you start
shooting the Silly String is that even though our parents did an
incredible job of improving things, such as enlarging our carbon
footprint, cultivating our status in the Muslim world and providing
us with a tip-top popular culture, we can do even better. We can
take the American dream to new heights.
So while my mom drives a little Blazer I won't settle
for anything less than an Escalade for my wife, and my
promise to my daughter will be a brand-new 2024 Hummer
when she turns 16. My parents, bless them, built a little
3,200-square-foot crackerbox of a house, but I want at least
4,200. And I plan to live at least 40 miles from work so I can
spend quality time in my car talking on my cell phone and
listening to my favorite rap and bass beat at 320 decibels.
Our generation will build more highways, third and fourth
Narrows bridges and affordable housing for 10 million
Washingtonians. Yes, we'll grow, and we'll do it by finally
making people as important as fish, paving wetlands and
farms and claiming the woods from the cougar and bear
and stupid owl.
I don't know about you, but my education didn't end when I
walked out of my last final in woodshop this week. I'll listen to
shock jocks and TV to get a feel for the world around me. I'll buy
an Enquirer or Star every once in a while to stay informed but
not one of those boring newspapers. I'll vote if Tim Eyman has
something on the ballot, but who's got time otherwise?
The girls of our generation had outstanding role models
in Madonna, Courtney Love and Anna Nicole Smith, smart
businesswomen who used their brains to advance, but
there is so much more potential for our daughters. They
will be able to idolize Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan and
Paris Hilton, which will make it nice for our red-blooded
sons. TV and movies are entering their Golden Era just
in time for us to raise our kids on them and the Internet.
MySpace hasn't seen anything until the pictures of my
gorgeous 14-year-old daughter hit.
Interpersonal communication has been improving since
the Tech Revolution started, but we can take it to the zenith,
spending hours on the Web, dog-piling on someone in a chat room,
e-mailing the person in the next cubicle at work, checking our
BlackBerrys and cell phones for 20 minutes at parties, signing
on-line guest books instead of going to funerals and building more
drive-throughs.
Our parents had something called civil liberties, which
sounds pretty suspicious to me. We can have a better
world, one with warrantless searches, wiretapped phones,
FBI and Hbmeland Security collection of data on citizens,
detention without charges, government regulation of the
press, roadblocks for drunk-driving checks, weekly drug
tests for schoolchildren and undercover officers working
in the schools. Then we'll be safe.
Our parents and older brothers and sisters brought regime
change and peace to Iraq, but we can bring Pax Halliburtona to
so many more - in Iran, North Korea, Venezuela and France.
Then, after we bring new leadership to one of our worst enemies,
we'll stand down when the French stand up.
We won't stop until we have completed our parents'
mission to outsource every manufacturing and support
job in the United States, leaving us all with mice in our
hands at work in the Information Age. Americans don't
need strong backs; all they need are strong index fingers
to double-click. Anything menial that needs to be done
here we can have Hispanics do before we arrest them.
We won't even need farms. The Chinese will provide all we
need to eat, and we'll be able to depend on their spotless food-
safety record and our good credit.
The Class of 2007 will be the doers. We'll build the Sonics
a $500-million arena as a top priority and bring more
cage-fighting events to the Tacoma Dome. We'll solve the
obesity epidemic with new drugs for diabetes, cholesterol
and hypertension. We'll fix our educational system with
more tests. We'll build vast new prisons to resolve the
crime problem. Weql expand gambling to provide more
revenue for the government. We'll develop a better
hydrogen bomb to defend ourselves. We'll bring Starbucks
to the Third World. We'll restore the right kind of prayer
in our schools. We'll pass a constitutional amendment to
stop flag-burning, one of the most serious problens this
country faces.
By the time we finish improving the world, our kids will thank
us at their own high-school graduation. In fact, there probably
won't be anything left that they can improve.
-CG
u
Shelton-00 at
00lason ourn
county usPs 492-800
POSTMASTER: Send address changes to Shelton-Mason
County Journal, P.O. Box 430, Shelton, WA 98584•
Published weekly by Shelton Publishing Inc. at 227 West Cota Street, Shelton, Washington
Mailing address: p.o. Box 430, Shelton, WA 98584
Telephone (360) 426-4412 * www.masoncounty.com
Periodicals postage paid at Shelton. Washington
Member of Washington Newspaper Publishers' Association
SUBSCRIPTION RATES: $31.00 per year in-county address,
$45.00 per year in state of Washington $55.00 per year out of state
Charles Gay, editor and publisher. Newsroom: Sean Hanlon, managing editor, Port of Shelton;
Steve Patch, sports editor; Jeff Green, general assignment, city government, schools; Rebecca
Wells, society editor, county government; Mary Duncan, police, courts. Advertising: Stephen
Gay, advertising manager; Dave Pierik and Harvey Morris, ad sales. Front office: Julie Orme,
business manager; Kathy Lester, circulation; Donna Kinnaird, bookkeeper; Cricket Carter, mailroom
supervisor. Composing room: Diane Riordan, supervisor; Margot Brand, Jan Kaltinen, pagination;
Frank Isaac, pagination, photo technician; Koleen Wood, typesetter, computer system manager; Wil-
liam Adams, ad builder, computer system manager; Clinton Kendall, proofreader. Pressroom: Kelly
Riordan, pressman; Nick Carr, pressman's assistant.
Page 4 - Shelton-Mason County Journal - Thursday, June 14, 2007
II
i00eadeJ's;" 00ournal:
School action not disturbing
Editor, The Journal."
In rebuke of the Hood Canal
School Board's recent decision
to make administrative changes
(June 7 letter, "Hood Canal move
disturbing"), Merlyn Flakus al-
ludes in spirit to the old bumpkin
aphorism, "If it ain't broke don't
fix it." Such thinking cautions us
to uphold status quo and tempts
us to accept things as they are cur-
rently operating when they could
be made to operate better.
In defense of status quo, Flakus
discounts the competence of the
school board by making puerile
jabs at motives, character and in-
tentions, which he had to invent
on his own since he doesn't know
what the real ones are. To the con-
trary, I think that the board has
made administrative.changes in
good faith and with courage and
has defended a difficult decision
that is in the best interest of the
children in our community.
Hood Canal, in my view as a
parent of two attending students,
is not a progressive model of a
school. It lacks any sort of arts,
music or language programs. It
lacks a technology program. Its
classroom office equipment is usu-
ally outdated. Its sports facilities
and" equipment are often inade-
quate. The school basically has the
look and feel of being underfund-
ed. Many residents go out of their
way to send their children to grade
school or junior high in Shelton in-
stead of Hood Canal due to some
perceived inadequacy or another.
While Hood Canal might be
"working" in whatever way Flakus
means to suggest, it certainly could
work much better. It is the prima-
ry job of school boards to hold ad-
ministrators to the standards and
expectations of the constituency
that keeps them at their post, and
I believe the Hood Canal School
Board or, at least three-fifths of it,
is doing just that.
Flakus issues a "call to arms"
for new board members who I sup-
pose, like him, think that chang-
ing the status quo is typically bad.
Hood Canal needs committed ad-
ministrators and board membe
• '11
who are continuously seeki g
make :hanges and address di"
cul sues within the fram ew¢
of enhancing the education
character of our children.
Perceived crises in
always bring opinion.
fusspots like Merlyn FlakuS
others who really are not
in the education of our
flock to board meetings
and prattling and conjuring
lems in order to have so
to criticize. As soon as eve
calms down, away they go
their bags full of wisdon i
of some new controversy,
set foot in the school board
again.
I urge voters who are
in this matter to seek the
opinions of the parents and
ers of the Hood Canal School
trict and to take with a gri.
salt the rhetoric of our,
ubiquitous rabble-rousers. .
Rob Endi
H odW
The Journal is anti-veteran
Editor, The Journal:
Kudos to the Forest Festival
Committee for its untiring efforts
year after year to ensure the citi-
zens of Shelton an outstanding
parade as well as other extra ac-
tivities,
It was extra gratifying to see
the picture of tii Boy Scout Troop
110. As the adjutant of the Sons
of the American Legion Squadron
No. 31, we are honored and proud
to be their sponsors. Squadron
commander Mav Rowley is our
representative to the troop.
There is a very important is-
sue that needs to be addressed, to
wit, the absence of any pictures of
the American Legion, Veterans of
Foreign Wars and members of the
40 et 8 and the LaFemmes. These
four units are very much civic-ori-
ented.
I have heard many comlnents
about this situation. It is very ap-
parent to a majority of us that The
Journal is anti-veteran.
These veterans' organizations
donate many hours and funds
support of the youth of our c0'
munity.
We sincerely hope this overs t:h
will be corrected in the future.
Gordie Rich.°-
Life member American Le
Veterans of Foreign "%
Disabled American VeteW,'
Sons of The American be
Mr. Bush, tear down that w$00l
Montana may revolt" some st
may wish to secede.' The prOfi;
may take decades to reach eqt it
rium, but with reasonabl s
Editor, The Journal:
Even the casual reader of the
daily news can't help but conclude
that our Congress is in a hopeless
state of confusion. The immigra-
tion issue is a perfect example: One
hundred senators have so far man-
aged to turn the problem into 350
pages of what they probably con-
sider "tightly reasoned" rules and
regulations to solve the problem
but which can only be understood
by a bunch of high-priced lawyers
who would tell you (if quizzed off
the record) that the whole thing is
unworkable anyway.
We all know what the problem
is: Mexicans want to come to the
U.S. for a variety of reasons but
are denied legal entry by burden-
some and lengthy legalities which
once were considered reasonable
but are no longer adequate for
today's problems. So many Mexi-
cans now sneak across the border
illegally that "experts" estimate
their number to be upwards of 12
million. Walking down a street in
any Southern California town you
would be hard-pressed to know
whether you are in the United
States or Mexico. Trying to stem
the tide of "illegals" is like shovel-
ing sand into the wind, which is
exactly what Congress is doing.
Let us face reality and accept
an unpopular solution. It will be
called dual citizenship, an open
border, free movement of citizens
of both countries to pass freely
back and forth. We might as well
coniler including all the coun-
tries of Central America in this
plan. Tear down the fence that is
now building but save the parts
because we will need to erect it
again perhaps down near Panama
where it can be much shorter and
more easily patrolled.
The United States of North
America! Think of the opportuni-
ties for Anglo entrepreneurs! So
much development will take place
in the Mexican states that their
unemployed workers will stay
home. Millions of U.S. citizens will
move south to live in the sun; ho-
tels and casinos will line the Mexi-
can coast; inland, manufacturing
plants will have jobs that attract
workers from north and south. Ah,
the possibilities!
Concessions will be required on
both sides, of course. Bilingualism
will be necessary; the respective
governments will be adjusted in
ways yet to be determined. The
Anglo population must insist that
Mexico clean up its bad habits
concerning public corruption, ex-
tortion, bribery, cumshaw, palm
greasing, etc., until the practice is,
at least, brought up to levels pre-
vailing in our country.
There are endless problems of
course, and monumental details
to be worked out, but they can be
done. Tranquility will not come
at once; great patience will be re-
quired. The citizens of Idaho and
can be accomplished, ve
Congress will be in hog henri
working out the details. We€
be so busy here at home there
be no need to go off and make
chief in other parts of the wor
Look at it this way" If Hera ":
Cortez and his fellows had..
Englishmen instead of Spar
the whole thing would have ri
an accomplished fact o
ago. Pete :1
What was that soOg
.... o the
t'aul simon sang - .,,e
Parisians about s LI *'.,
exits at their most fa Sa°
museum?
"Fifty Ways to LeaVe Y°ar
Louvre."
me
--mmi