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Newspaper Archive of
Shelton Mason County Journal
Shelton, Washington
July 3, 1975     Shelton Mason County Journal
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July 3, 1975
 
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The time has arrived for the Journal's second annual Current Events Survey and Salmon Bake. The rules remain the same. Readers are invited to fill in the answers with pen, pencil, crayon or peanut butter. Neatness does not count and wrong answers are not penalized, which means everyone can score 100. !. What is Henry Jackson's stand on the Vietnam war? (circle three) (a) all for it; (b) opposed it; (c) needs time to think it over. 2. What is the nation's number one priority? (circle one) (a) a swimming pool for Gerald Ford; (b)a congressional pay raiseq(c) amnesty for CIA agents. 3. What goes up but never comes down? (take your pick) (a) the price of gasoline; (b)the price of gasoline; (c) the price of gasoline. 4. What will Richard Nixon's next job be: (circle one) (a) warm-up man for Billy Graham; (b) tax consultant for Howard Hughes; (c) public relations director for Patricia Hearst. 5. Now that Cambodia has learned its lesson, what will be the next world power to be shown the United States' military might? (circle one or more) (a) Zambia;(b) Iceland; (c) Wyoming. 6. For what political office is George Wallace qualified? (circle three) (a) governor of Alabama; (b) governor of Mississippi; (c) governor of Louisiana. 7. For what political office is Ronald Reagan qualified? (circle one) (a) warm-up man for Billy Graham; (b) tax consultant for Howard Hughes; (c) public relations director for Patricia Hearst. 8. Who is Henry Kissinger? (circle one) (a) a Pepsi-Cola salesman; (b)Nelson butler; (c) a Vietnamese refugee. Rockefeller's 9. What will cause the nation's next great moral crisis? (circle olle) (a) Ann Landers' second nmrringe; (b) X-rated attractions at Disneyland; (c) Lassie's divorce. iO. Which new prod~t will cmptare .~ buy~ public's fancy during the next year? (circle one) (a) coin-operated shoes; (b)soybean cigarettes; (c) denim lingerie. I 1. What is causing the high unemployment rate? (a) lazy people who don't want to ~rk; (b) illegal aliens who have gobbled up all the best jobs; (c) welfare recipients who are saving their money instead of spending it. 12. Which of the following would you favor eliminating to cut down the cost of education? (circle one) (a) school plant; (b) teachers; (c) students. 13. Who will be Muhammad Ali's next opponent? (circle 011{.~) (a) Truman Capote; (b) Margaret Truman; (c) Howard Cecil. 14. Who is the darkhorse candidate for President in 1976? (circle one) (a) George Seabiscuit; (b) John Citation; (c) Walter Whirlaway. 15. Is pollution really as bad as the screamers claim? (circle one) (a) of course (cough) not; (b) don't be (gasp) silly; (c) the environmentalists are (wheeze) overreacting. Send your completed survey form to the Journal at Box 430, Shelton, Washington. All forms which are unsigned will remain confidential. Forms with the earliest postmark will be .sent to the Smithsonian Institute. McGinnis' Fort Jm'eli reports: There's a new in the Hollywood set - Reducing Roulette. You buy a dx-puck dietary supplement, one of the cans contains beer." (Troy Gordon in Tulsa World) Dick Bell sends along copies of excuses written by the parents of children absent from school. They're authentic. "My son is under the doctor's care and should not take P;E. Please execute l'dm." "'Please e me Blanche from P.E. for a few days. Ymtm lay she fell out of a tree and misplaced her hip." "'My dmqlhter was al~ yesterday because She was tired. She spent the weekend with the Marines." "Please excuse Joey Friday. He had loose vowels." "'Mary could not come to school because abe was bothered wtih very dose eins." "Mary Ann was absent because she had a fev ,.sore throat, headache and up t stomach. Her sister was also - fev and sore throat. Her brother had a low wade temp and Itched all ov~'. ! wa~'t ft eling the best, either, sore throat and fever. There mint he the Pm going around. Her father even got hot last night;" (Alex Thien in Milwaukee Sentinel) By STANLEY ROSENBLATT (Editor's note: The author, a Miami attorney, is a trial specialist in the tort field. He has written two books). The crime statistics recently released by the FBI show a continuing and inexorable trend - the increase of lawlessness everywhere (urban, suburban and rural). Approximately one out of fifty serious crimes results in a conviction. This statistic becomes even more incredible when we realize that most crime is never reported to the authorities. One-half of all criminal arrests in the United States are for drunkenness, disorderly conduct, vagrancy and gambling. This preoccupation with victimlem mimes is a root cause of our nation's failure to solve real crimes like murder, robbery, rape, aggravated assault and burglary. The mple truth is that crime pays all too well. Cynics and law violaters are created every time a murder or robbery goes unsolved. Any criminal justice system worth its name must be successful in apprehending and punishing criminals. Ours fails to meet this obvious priority. Because law and l Olitics are intertwined in America we have been conditioned to believe that the criminal law is our primary instrument for establishing desirable patterns of behavior. .Consider all the unenforced and unenforceable laws against adultery, fornication, pornography, drug and drink intake, and prostitution. The American middle-class must disabuse itself of the dangerous notion that its l ofemed moralistic values can be enfercod by police, prosecutors and judges. The law can effectively provide remedies for relatively few wrongs on an intespenoul level (absent the use of fe¢ce). There is no criminal justice system in America. There can be no system while amateur police are split into forty thousand separate departments or while harried and politicized deal makers called prosecutors negotiate 90 per cent of their convictions. There can be no system while poorly trained, hack. judges know more about getting out the vote than they do about the United States Constitution. In ' England the average time between Page 4 - Shelton-Mason County Journal - Thursday, July 3, 1975 arrest and trial is one month; irl America the average time is never! We have never been serious about crime and law enforcement in this country. If we were, the situation would never have been permitted to deteriorate to its present pitiful state. As but one example, the field of traffic regulation occupies a totally disproportionate amount of time and effort by the three basic branches of any criminal justice system - police, prosecutors and judges. Police should be removed from traffic control altogether, and prosecutors and judges should stop playing at trying traffic offenses. The criminal trial is not an institution meant to deal with millions of petty traffic violations each year. There can be no adversary proceeding when a hearing is expected to take five minutes and where twenty minutes is regarded as an intolerable fih'buster. Civilians could be trained in short order to enforce traffic laws. Speeding, like drunk driving, fi is a scientific question rather than a judicial one. If a violator refused to stop or otherwise resisted, then the traffic enforcer could summon the police. Policemen should be solving crimes and apprehending criminals and preparing their testimony in important trials; they should not be wasting time waiting to testify about an improper U-turn. We must come to understand the real function of law as well as its limitations. The law must protect us from others, not from ourselves. It is self defeating to attempt to regulate purely personal habits• We are extraordinarily slow learners in this country, for certainly our Prohibition debacle should have taught us once and for all that laws are an ineffective weapon in the battle against "immorality." Hypocritical laws which are selectively enforced actually stimulate the aggrandizement of organized crime and are in themselves a debasing and corrupting influence. We must aboli all laws against pornography, abortion and consensual sexual acts. We must stop calling acts crimes which have no victims like vagrancy and disorderly conduct. The full panoply of constitutional due process is a luxury we cannot afford for the ordinary trivial offense. Professionalism and the scientific method must replace politics throughout our entire criminal justice system. We must establish high national standards for the employment of law enforcement personnel. We need regional police departments headed by career administrators. Reform cannot be the answer. To paraphrase John Dean, "There is a cancer growing on justice and law enforcement." What we must have immediately is devastating structural changes in many of our political institutions and a total divorce of law enforcement from politics. Reprinted from Jndicatme, May issue. When the adoring throng of thousands turned out on March 19 to watch the swallows return to California's old mission at San Juan Capistrano, most of them probably didn't even realize that a less romantic bird, a buzzard, had already upstaged the cliff swallows. On March 15, after their long winter sojourn to the south, the large, gaunt turkey buzzards were welcomed back to a small town near Cleveland, Hinckley, Ohio, with festivities and thousands of buzzard watchers. For as long as residents can remember, the ugly but dependable birds have returned to Hinckley on the same day, though no one made much of a fuss of it until newspapers noted the event in 1957. The notoriety drew about 9,000 buzzard watchers, and the birds were unofficially established as Hinckley's official harbingers of spring and a marvelous excuse for an annual party. Reports have it that the buzzards are never invited because of their terrible table manners. They thrive on refuse and can subsist on carrion that other local animals would not touch. A local schoolteacher composed a song called "The Buzzard Bump," and a poet in Cleveland wrote "The Buzzards of Hinckley." The shoulder patch on the town's police uniform was even redesigned to depict three soaring buzzards set against a rising sun. ~lllllllllll lilt Editor, TIll: prevail, let the penalty be equal: Now : time for allthe crime. Let the person registered of Washington what the penalty is before State to themselves in she commits the crime, that, regards to punishment. Be many crimes will not sure you ned only once; committed, reducing both cr petition ifore June 27. and the number of criminals. 118,000 vmures will place person who believes that a the issue ndatory capital penalty does not deter crime punishme the November not know human behavior ballot so ." people's voice dreaming. will be hhis initiative, if This initiative's eond passed, ake the death passed in the Seante 33-14. ] penalty tory for the House members copped-outl murderemven different not facing the issue and killd situations, by referring it to the Re If by continue toC o m m i t t e e. P o s s i bl have a governor (as Representatives Conner we now md he or she Savage can explain this. I comrnutesath sentence or If you need copies of petiti is declare0stitutional, the call 898-2808 or 426-3077 penalty wfe imprisonment 426-5779. Let's do what 1 with NO ion, NO parole, courts and legislators failed to| NO reducl time, and NO work releatrlough possible. This, c of Washington, (Editor's Note: This letter is your tunity to do received two weeks ago. s omethinstructive in an oversight on the editor's correcting f the evils of our was not printed before judicial , the injustice deadline mentioned in the which has done bY th'bAlthough that "soft-heartlges, juries and passed, the writer has asked "courts'heir permissive his letter be published to dealings wiinals. Of this we forth his views on the have had, . Let justice penalty.) krn, H. ,. • ,as IS txlr I By JIM F RALD [ISS Wltl didn't mean to but[manai Majorral Kenneth Houghton " , raemi:dedddCOTPlwet;leYif rng:t::;tr;etelebrate the}c 3[¢er°gc: Y " chnok That lay 8, 1945; the day World War II end ntrdi Europe. ~or readers, this is a war story.., lCorm When of the German surrender came, I was ~ I-fi~itc hospztal zburb of Munich. I had been suffering therefore syphilie risked his life for us, bravely ignodng d "n_s by warnings ¢ training films," the sign said. ~ _ lit A ctua~had the flu. I got sick sleeping on the st~ha~: ground ir lousy rain. That's why, even today, ~-~ ' 7 o ¢,!ts I ea ng, I automatically retort: "W i;¢e, wo : didn't it?'" Anyw the time the army shuffled my body throeveral tent cities and finally into a was no lolick. But I kept moaning and even put a of soap inarmpit. It is a military myth that you can yourself a' by putting soap under your arms. All it is force yO~alk with your arms tight by your sides. But I a few extra days in bed anyway. I doctor I ~1 that way because I'd swallowed my think I of to prove it by spitting bullets, or like that. t en 30 years and I can't remember You rwonder what's the point in revealing cowardice his late date. The point is that I coward, I a typical soldier. We weren't really but we we fools, either. Happiness was where the weren't. F~ldiers are the same today. Whenebu hear a soldier begging the doctor to lel out of the,ital, even though he has 2 broken legs, can "get lag my buddies and kill some more Germans" vhenever you hear that you know popcorn fo. in the lobby. Major Iral Houghton, who turned my calendar to 1945, ismander of the 3rd Marine Division. It men who ated the wrong island in the bloody the Mayag Cambodia. He beat his breast on TV explained vt was such a great victory for his boys: "At tlxk of sounding like a warmonger, I describe it lixir for morale. These young marines been trainild want to get out and do a job." That's he said. ,, j An eli is a potion with magical powers to re~ Ch~ and cure. Tuneful is claiming his men get bored and just trainin kill. It makes them feel much betteIi experience 'eal thing - to shoot at live targets and t! shot back abturn. Of couthe elixir failed the marines who died Mayaguez aCure. It didn't do much for those missing, fit]And it probably doesn't help those much to their sons weren't bored when they killed. Given a ice, in 1945 or 1975, most marines pick a weeb in San Diego as a much greater elixir invading an d. At the of sounding disrespectful, I'd say Houghton sta be selling the popcorn in the lobby. Founded 1886 by Grant C. Angle Mailing Addreox 430, Shelton, Wa. 98584 Phone Publish¢ 227 West Cota Street, Shelton, Mason County, Washington 98584, weekly. Se~-class postage paid at Shelton, Washington "nber of Natiohal Editorial Association MembeWashington Newspaper Publishers' Association i SUBSCIION RATES: $6.00 per year in Mason CountY, ~lvance --Outside Mason County $7.50 E31TOR ANE~LISHER ......................